Issue #103

The Marvelous One's Strongman Day!!

By: Marv

Precontest...
Its about 8:30am my time. I could barely finish my protein shake.Afterwards felt like ralfing it back up. Always get nervous before the comps. I have my equipment packed, double checked it, and will try to eat something solid before the comp starts. Well ladies I gotta go; official weigh in is at 9:00 this morning. Wish me luck!!!

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Post contest...
Well, let me start from the beginning. Weigh-ins were started at about 9:15 am. I weighed in officially at 316lbs. Not even close to being the heaviest!! Heaviest guy was 405lbs(estimated 'cause the scale only reaches 400lbs.). After the weigh-in, we had about an hour or so to kill. So, I went to go get something to eat, and had to force a BK whopper down. I know its not the best thing to eat, but I was so nervous, even that was hard to do (plus, it's a tradition; I've done that the last 3 times).

The competitors meeting was at 10:45am, so we all had a seat and were explained the rules and set some weights for the comp. Since so many peepz had signed up (50 guys!!) after the 2nd event, the last 20 guys were going to be let go. That seemed really fair; that's just toooo many people. After the 3rd event, the last 10 were going to be dropped. We were told the rules and we agreed that for the DEAD we were going to do 550lbs. for reps. So, here is the order of the events.

1. Texas stone (300lb. stone for distance)
2. Tire flip (600lb. tire, it was about 12-14 flips, timed)
3. 8 kegs thrown to the back of a truck bed
4. DEADLIFT (550lbs. for reps)
5. H1 and H2 hummer pull (timed event, like tire flip)

So, here we go!! I drew number 42 on the stone. Which was great, 'cause I suck at this event. It took over an hour for my turn to come. A forklift picks up the stone (a chain is attached to the stone) and then you grab it and haul ass. I knew how many times I had to go up and down the track to do good in this event. So, I grabbed it and walked FAST!! It doesn't feel that heavy, but you can't breathe. I had gone about 250ft with it, and I couldn't hold my breath any longer. My wife then started yelling at me that I needed a li'l more to go; strange I couldn't hear anyone but her. I forced myself to keep going, and beat the previous best. Man, I was TIRED!! That rock gets heavy, quick!! I went 301 feet. There were 8 competitors left, and 2 beat me. 3rd place, I was VERY happy with that!!! On a funny note, some skinny kid took his turn on the rock. He picked up the rock off of the forklift and dropped it straight down on his foot!! Hilarious!!!

The tire flip was next. I like this event!! I drew number 10. Luckily there was 3 tires, so it went pretty fast. When it was my turn to go, I manhandled that tire. Piece of cake!! It takes a normal person 14 flips to finish the course, it took me 11. My time was 19 seconds. I thought it would stand up. The other competitors went, and second place was 22 seconds. So, I easily won this one. The guy that won the first event came in third. We both had a 1st place and a 3rd place. After this event, they threw away the trash and let the last 20 go, actually the last 19 'cause of the kid with a broken foot had already quit!!

My nerves had settled by now and I was HUNGRY. I had about 6 protein bars in my backpack. Ate 3 of them right there. They also had free pizza and cokes for the atheletes, so I ate a slice also. Ok, I ate 2!!

Next event, the keg toss onto a pickup. I drew 30!! Xcellent!! The fastest time was 20 seconds. The kegs were right next to the truck, so you have to take like 2 or 3 steps to reach the kegs and 2 or 3 steps to throw it onto the truck. The thing was that the bed of the truck wasn't waist level, it was chest level!! My turn came and the guy that was tied with me had the second best time so far. At first, the kegs are pretty light, but some 6,7,8, they get F*CKING HEAVY!! I came in 3rd, 4 tenths of a second behind 2nd place!!

After this event, they let go of 10 more. So now we have the 20 best the city has to offer!! I was in 2nd place going into the last 2 events.

The DEAD. Time to seperate the men from the boys!!! By coincidence, me and the guy who was ahead of me (who I will now refer to as Joe; hey it beats writing the "other guy ahead of me"!!) got paired up together. That was pretty cool!! When the crowd (and that crowd was big!! At least 200 people) saw that we were going last, they went nuts!! So, Joe and I went to the DEAD platform and the crowd was loud!! I really wanted this event, to be the "King of the DEAD"!! No straps, bare grip, no suits, man to man, time to roll!!! Whistle blows and we pick up the weight. We were going up and down, like we were forklifts!! I could hear my wife yelling at me, but not the crowd. She later told me that she couldn't hear herself yelling 'cause the crowd was going nuts!! We got to 24 reps (24 F*CKING REPS!!) before we stopped.

The ref said we were tied. And one of us had to pick up one more, at least. So, Joe tried to do his first and failed!! I went right after him, and I swear to God it seemed like 10 minutes of pure agony, trying to pick it up. I pulled and I pulled, and finally the ref said it was a good lift and I dropped the weight. I had done 25 reps at 550lbs. I have never come close to that amount of reps. It was drive and determination and adrenaline that helped me pick that weight up!! That event ROCKED!!! We are tied for first place!!

After this event, I ate the other 3 protein bars, 2 more slices of pizza, and took a nap in the back seat of my truck 'cause I was f*cking tired.

Last event. Since it was obvious that Joe and I were the only ones that could win, the refs decided that we would go 9th and 10th for the Hummers pull. We flipped a coin and he won, so he decided I would go ahead of him.

Hummers pull. Everyone that had gone before me had failed. There was a li'l dip in the road, so eveyone had got stuck on the way up the dip. I got strapped in and told my wife to walk beside me and yell at me for encouragement. The whistle blew and I took off as fast as I could. The H1 didnt feel too bad, but when the second one hits, F*CK!! It feels like you are going to stop, but I kept on. I saw the li'l dip in the road. I also knew that the H1's tire was about 4-5 feet behind me, so when I felt that the tire was going down hill, I stepped it up a notch!! The dip was maybe 2 inches but it made a HUGE difference. i got the first H1 over the dip(no one had done that) but the second H2 got stuck!! Damn!! Well, at least I went further than anyone else had and hoped that the distance would hold up. Joe was next. He got strapped in, and as soon as the whistle blew, he took off. He was going pretty fast. As soon as the second H2's rope straightened out ready for the truck to be pulled, it stopped!! I guess he had run out of energy and couldn't pull either truck!! He struggled to get the trucks moving but once it stops, you are f*cked!! Afterwards, he said that the DEADS had drained him. Amen to that!!

So, "The Marvelous One" had won!!! Afterwards, there was a trophy presentation; actually a nice trophy, and a check for 500 bucks; that was really nice!! It was a cool comp, I had a blast, especially the DEAD event. I am sooooooooooo tired and my whole body aches!! I feel crappy!! Its 10pm right now, I'm going to celebrate by going to sleep!! Thanks guys for your support!!