Issue #102

Buying Killer Supplements (Plus - How to Spot the Scammers!) - Secrets of "Ad"vertorial Writing

by: Grendel

Nice title right! Look familiar? - it should, because it is the very style of writing used by several major online "bodybuilding" marketers to lure in newcomers, suckers, and even an occasional seasoned veteran. How do I know? Because, sadly my dear friends, I have danced with the devil. In this article I am going to show you how marketers deliberately write title headings, sales letters, and targeted emails to pique your interest. I will also illustrate why so many companies cling to the idea that a higher price fools consumers into thinking that the product must be worth a damn - its expensive and no one would dare charge a lot for something that doesn't work…would they? Hahahaahhahaha. Oh.

The "Ad"vertorial

In case you don't know what I mean by "Ad"vertorials, I am referring to those testimonies you can read in just about any hobby magazine that are really just not-so-cleverly disguised plugs for a product (usually written by an associate of the company selling the products).

Here is an example of the offending text:

The Total Skeptic Is Converted

I was the total skeptic. Not only had I lifted weights for years, but after 21 years in the martial arts, I thought I'd seen it all. So I just didn't believe Matt Furey when he said you can get kick-butt fit with bodyweight calisthenics. I could bench 400 and squat 625. So there's no way that I was going to fall for something so "simple."

But I couldn't shake this feeling that Furey might be right. I had read about the Great Gama of India, a wrestler who followed this program and was unbeaten in 5,000 matches. In terms of size and strength, he was amazing. He was 5'7" and 260 pounds of streaming steel. And that was in the early 1900's - long before steroids.

I had heard that Bruce Lee did the exercises Furey teaches, too. And we all know about Lee's incredible ripped, lean, muscular look. Not to mention how lightning fast and fluid he was.

Let's pause and parse out this text. I can show you at least three classic moves in the short paragraphs above.

1. Acknowledge their doubt a.k.a. "I was a total skeptic" - This is a classic ploy. You assure your audience that you are too honest to ever deceive them. Or, you promise that you "were just like them"…when you make ridiculous claims you know you will alert most readers. By acknowledging "how crazy" or how "controversial" your information is and admitting you used to be a skeptic you can placate some readers. It's the same tactic used by strippers and Hooters girls - "I am so glad you guys came in, everyone else here is a real pathetic loser, but you guys seem cool" (yep! Thank you South Park!)

2. Refer to some ancient culture or legendary figure - It is always a good idea to refer to something or someone that is impossible to verify. Whether it is Atlantis, Charles Atlas, alien races, or some semi-mystical Asian race, many people are easily convinced that some secret has been buried for centuries. And, of course, for just $99.99 plus shipping and handling you can be clued in. Did you know that ancient Mongolians had a vastly superior form of data structures and that LINUX is based on those ancient principles? See what I mean. Here, the appeal is for you to believe in an old Indian wrestler. Notice that is he is only barely identified - you could never really independently investigate this allegation because you don't even know the wrestlers full name. Above all, the guy is dead! He certainly couldn't object to his name being used (if he ever existed) and you could never contact him to verify his endorsement. Pretty clever.

3. BRUCE LEE - For some reason, many people will believe anything about Bruce Lee. If people claim Bruce Lee could fly, I am sure that there are plenty of people who would whole-heartedly believe it. I would imagine some poor fools would pay for any program Bruce Lee even wiped his ass with. I will spare you, the gentle reader, my full opinion on the cult of Bruce Lee, but generally, I advise you to be highly suspicious of anyone claiming that Bruce Lee used or endorsed their product. Remember - he is DEAD! So, he is a perfect shill for any product.

The Formula

Sales letters and other forms of marketing abide by certain writing formulae. The trick, apparently, is to tell the reader a benefit you gain and at the same time (usually in parenthesis at the end of the sentence) show a common drawback you avoid.

Let me give you some examples using my own Anabolic Extreme articles; Heir to the Throne, Site Injections, and the series Genetics and Genetics Revisited. If I were to make these into chapters for an e-book, the formula would dictate that I present them as follows:

Heir to the Throne: Be Your Own Guru - An Introduction

Become an Anabolic Guru - secrets for easily gaining the inside information you can use to transform your physique. (And how to spot charlatans, impostors, and phony gurus, trying to keep you from reaching your goals.)

Site Injections: Learn how and where to inject your steroids for quick increases in size for those hard to improve muscles like your calves and biceps. (And learn how to overcome the fear and risks associated with this cutting edge technique used by professionals)

Know your Limits: Genetics and Genetics Revisited

Your Genetics - Understanding your genetic potential for maximizing muscularity. (And secrets for overcoming your genetic limitations.)

How I do know about the formula? Sadly enough I worked for a brief time with a major online bodybuilding 'presence' in attempt to create an e-book out of some of my previous writings. Ultimately, it was too shady of a business and I would have ended up being a tremendous whore - now I don't mind a little whoring, but what was being asked of me was a bit much.

I will be the first to admit that 'the formula' is not blatant deception. It is like a homely girl putting on a nice amount of make-up (or like me wearing my dad's Rolex) - it is an attempt to give something a nice, albeit calculated, spin. So the fact that a writer uses 'the formula' does not mean that the underlying product has no merit. However, I suggest that 'the formula' is a "tell" - you should see it as an indicator that the there is an overt attempt being made to add sophistication to the sale of the product or service. Generally, good products and services sell themselves. So, while use of 'the formula' shouldn't automatically send you running, if you see it in the presence of any of the other tricks of the trade I am alerting you to in this article you are probably face-to-face with a shady marketer and probably an inferior or bunk product.

Price as Proxy for Quality

More is better - right. It is the mantra of the western world: bigger, faster, stronger…more, more, more. As a corollary, we also suspect (well, ok, we know) that the best things in the world are expensive. A good car, a good watch, a good home all cost money and the nicer the item, the more it sets you back. So it is not surprising that economics has long ago observed that people tend to use price as a proxy for quality. Imagine you are in a supermarket, on an errand to get some laundry detergent. You have no clue about any of the brands or their reputations but you see that brand X is 99 cents a pound while Premium Brand is $2.99 a pound - many consumers would assume Premium Brand is a more effective product, based simply on the assumption that a higher price means higher quality.

Sadly, the truth is many consumers items, particularly food products, all come from roughly the same place. The local supermarket brand is probably produced by the same people that produce the more expensive named brands; you just pay more for advertising. Now, I am making many generalizations but you can see the point I am trying to make. Case-in-point, during one of my semi-frequent bouts of insomnia I caught a late night infomercial for some fat-burning wonder drug. The price was exorbitantly high and the advertisement called attention to just that fact, as if it was justification enough for me to yank out the old visa card.

Whenever I receive 'spam' advertising some new bodybuilding e-book, I always notice how expensive they are. Funny that normal authors like lowly Stephen King and J.K. Rowling can only get 20 bucks for their hardbacks, right off the presses with a meager millions of fans waiting in line at midnight to snag a copy. However, a bodybuilding guru, who has never even been seen, can get away with charging $99.99 a copy for an EBOOK - a fucking ebook! - You don't even have printing costs with an e-book! What I love even more is when the book is discounted down to 45 dollars (from $99.99). What a great bargain, I am always tempted to get two at that price.

Now it is entirely possible that some of these products are worth every penny. However, you always have to ask yourself a few questions. In the case of supplements, when you get close to spending even a hundred dollars for 30 pills, aren't you entering the same price range as real drugs? Further, if a product is so effective as to justify that kind of price, why isn't it a prescription drug? Don't think for a second that major drug companies wouldn't pounce on a bonafide weight loss solution that was THAT effective and THAT side effect free. When you are dealing with books, the call is a lot more subjective. It might be worth it for you to have quick access to a host of information. But remember that you can probably find all that knowledge for free, scattered around websites and discussion boards.

Conclusions

I will admit that when I first began getting into bodybuilding, I was tempted by almost all the pitfalls I have outlined above. I remember lying by the pool, my freshman year of college, re-reading a Muscletech advertisement for their very first pro-hormone product. I was enthralled. How could they lie about this stuff, I mean, who would make such insane claims if they weren't true? Yeah, the products were expensive, but if they worked…wouldn't that be worth it all? My workout partners and I debated the merits and pitfalls of the products endlessly. Fortunately I did not spend my money that summer.

As I became more educated, I started to see the same tactics used over and over again. At this point, I am so cynical of supplements I hardly ever deviate from the usual the tried and true. To be honest, I probably miss out on some great new products. However, it is so tough to find scrupulous sources of information on supplements. Therefore, I rely on my buddies and my colleagues here at Anabolic Extreme to point me in the right direction. I suggest that you establish a good rapport with a local supplement store (preferably one that is owned by a guy who you can interact with regularly and who will steer you in the right direction, or let you know what other customers are saying about a product) or that you find an internet outlet (one that is not affiliated with a supplement manufacturer) and listen to reviews or forum discussions. For me, that is the only way to keep your bearing in the sea of misconceptions, half-truths, and outright lies that is the bodybuilding world.